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Coyote mucking a gopher

I’d like to present an alternative to the “mainstream narrative” of this photo:

This coyote is biomechanical.

The gopher has successfully disguised entering the cockpit of this mechanical coyote rig as being eaten by it.

Now, imagine him settling into the seat and flipping switches, putting on his little helmet and going off in search of his arch-enemy Morris, the other gopher in this ridiculous story.

You see, Morris is a descendant of the gopher from Caddyshack. He’s always bragging about his distant grandfather besting a man sanctioned by the United Nations to kill gophers, a groundskeeper named Carl Spackler (played by Bill Murray).

Stupid asshole Morris thinks that because he’s related to a god among gopher folk, that somehow translates back to him.

And because Morris thinks he’s hot shit, he doesn’t care about anything or anyone else – going so far as to burrow into other gophers dens and take them over, creating a mega den where he hoards all the food for himself.

The time has come to teach Morris a lesson in humility, and what better way to do so then by piloting this blue eyed coyote over to Morris’ den and digging that bitch up.

Thats it, thats the end.

If you read this all the way through, I’m so sorry.



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